Hounds win! | Hounds lose... | Hounds Curry Night by Dunc, 9th Oct 2010
j_DAN dons the reporter’s cape and possibly stung by the label of “wordiest writer”, enters a report based on a stream of consciousness. For a brief journey through Jimmy’s mind, read on…
Corinthians 2 – 5 Hounds Reserves
Reserves played Corinthians in the cup. Nice bunch…
Ref was about 18 again…
Corinthians kick off. Shoot straight from kick off. Wide. Goal kick. Morons…
Fordy blazed over.
Fordy scored. […after an exact repeat of his earlier miss. Only this time, he took 14 touches before shooting. You know, just to make sure, seeing as shooting on the first touch didn’t work the first time.]
Dan got chopped by two players in the box. Stone wall penalty.
18 year old ref gave penalty.
Corinthians complained (& moaned).
Antonio scored (I can’t really remember it). Let’s say it was good. It usually is… [I can help out here – because for the second time in 3 games, I found myself in the 6 yard box. I SCREAMED for Antonio to pass it to me, to score (or miss) but he didn’t. The Corinthian goalie, not knowing my reputation for missing from within 3 yards, fell for it and allowed Antonio to score at the near post. That is so obviously an assist by me. This all came after a crunching challenge from Ridlengaarden that legitimately won the ball. Corinthians moaned (& complained) a bit, because we didn’t stop and kick the ball out for their half dead player.]
Corinthians got a dubious free kick on edge of area. Nonchalantly despatched into the postage stamp region of the goal. 3-1 (this may or may not have been the scoring pattern…) [Without sounding like a scratched record, I can also help here. What happened was… let’s just say I slipped near one of their players – I stuck out a hand to steady myself, accidentally resting my hand on one of their players. The next thing I know, he’s on the floor, literally >just like that<. Right old nancy. (Him). (Corinthian fellow).]
Half time. Maybe.
Hounds kick off, downhill and into the wind… Easy-peasy.
Dan K scores again. Bravo.
Jimmy gets subbed (massive moment in the game, obviously).
Hallo gets his leg broken by thuggish opponent.
Jimmy hears the break, sees red, walks on the pitch to confront (thuggish) opponent.
Hallo gets up. He’s fine.
Jimmy looks like a right tool…
Corinthians lino has a strop. Walks off. Jimmy takes flag.
Hounds score, Antonio is not offside as Corinthians number 12 does not understand offsides. Jimmy decides to use his flag as a pointing device (to point out the number 12 stood on his own goal line, thus playing everyone on the pitch onside…) which unfortunately makes it look like he is flagging for offside. Much arguing (& moaning & complaining) ensues… However, goal given.
Corinthians continue to moan and swear (etc.)
Man of the Match
Dunno… Tim maybe? [Nope! Fordy!] I gave it to Hallo even though he made me look like a dick.
Stoke Bishop 3 – 2 Hounds
Oh dear. No report.
Hounds Curry Night
Back to the theatre of nightmares – the curry house. Be there, or be doing something entirely more sober.