NEWS  :  Season 2010/11

Hounds Social Diary ™

4 goals for both teams in gale force conditions by Dunc, 5th Feb 2011

Jimmy is the man with the scribe this weekend, having been actually quoted as saying that this was one of his favourite games of the season. Ever. I rocked up to the changing rooms a little bit late and walked into the unmistakable hum of 27 sweaty, dirty football shirts. Now, I’ve been late before, but surely I wasn’t soooo late that I had arrived after the games had finished??! As it happens, no. Tim had forgotten to wash the kit… And had also emptied 14 bottles of Febreze (other fabric fresheners are available) onto the kit to try and hide the stink. Not a chance – it just stank of Meadow Fresh Sweat instead.

Hounds Reserves 4 – 1 Wellington Wanderers

Saturday 5th February, 2011. The windiest day known to man. And what better way to spend it than by kicking a ball about for an hour and a half, or at least trying to… The Hounds were looking to get revenge for a perhaps (OK, “definite”, I wanted to be viewed as slightly impartial in case any Wellies were reading…) unfortunate defeat earlier in the season…

So the mighty Hounds kicked off playing into the wind and it immediately became apparent that it was going to be one tough half indeed, with the ball seemingly penned in their half. Goal kicks were flying straight up the pitch, and then straight back again, Jimmy’s notorious power throw-ins only travelling a couple of metres and Dan K’s famous pace being limited to that which looked like he was miming a stroll through some quick sand… although saying that, this was the case in the second half too…

The Wellies and the wind battered the Hounds defence, but the back 4 and deputy ‘keeper Tom Cross held strong, limiting them to only a few shots on goal. Gerro was perhaps (OK, definitely) lucky to get away with a foul on their star striker inside the box with a slightly (very) miss-timed tackle from behind. However, it was Hounds who drew first blood, with a rare attack into the opposition half, Hallo crossing from the right, the defender slicing the ball into the air, only for it to be beautifully nodded into the top corner. By their goalie… Hilarious scenes… arms down by his side, the ‘keeper leapt like a salmon and found the postage stamp with supreme accuracy…

Wanderers soon exacted revenge for this when their brute of a number 9 cynically wiped Si out, off the pitch, leaving him in a crumpled heap. The ref decided that the tackle was worthy of nothing more than a free kick, which Jimmy as usual was fine about and commended the ref on his brave decision making, unlike Dan K, who told the ref that he would be looking to commit a similarly brutal tackle on an opponent and expect the same leniency. Which he received after he beautifully wiped out their wanker of a midfielder, Mr Jimmy Somerville… The only downside to this though was that they had a free kick, which was hit with some force, with the wind, definitely not hitting Jimmy’s swinging boot on the way in and coolly nestling in the corner. 1-1. A series of Welly corners were left by everyone except Hallo “the head”, who refused to leave his post after becoming (literally) quite attached to it.

The teams went in at half-time all square and the Hounds were boosted by fact that the hard half was over and it was time to bombard their goal for 45 minutes. I cannot recall the order of the goals, so I will guess from hereon in, but I think Tim definitely missed an easy chance. Let’s call it a miss of Chris Iwelumo proportions shall we? The Right Honourable Baron Von Ridlengaarden the 5th BA (Hons.) put an effort 2 inches past the post and their keeper was forced into a couple of saves as well… But goals were scored by Mr Daniel Kanaris (can’t remember it at all, this might be a lie…), another smashed home at 120 mph from 4 yards by Fordy, and in the last minute Timedin…, sorry Mcmahon, it’s not working, Tim ran through and made amends for his earlier miss with a cool finish to put the icing on the cake.

Wellington did have a few chances in the second half but were mainly chopped down outside the box (definitely outside the box) or scared off by Dunc.

Man of the match was shared, I think between Tim (fully deserved, despite bringing an unwashed kit for us all to wear), and Jeeves, who did nothing of note during the game. Pity votes again.

Lion FC 0 – 4 Hounds

We scored lots, they didn’t. Si C got a couple, Harvo got MOTM, did Cheqs get one? – yes, he did, as did Matt Little. Nice.

Dunc’s Quote(s) of the week…

“I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt…” The ref, after Gerro got chopped down by their big chap, 2011.

“I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt…” The ref, after Dan chopped down their baldy bloke, 2011.

“It’s up to the home team captain to pick up any dog turds on the pitch.” The ref, to Ridders, 2011.

“I’m the ref you know!” The ref, 2011.

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